Redefining Success: What If It’s Not What You Thought?
For most of my life, success looked like checking all the boxes.
Work hard. Be responsible. Do what’s expected. Make it look easy.
I didn’t question it—it was the model I saw growing up, and for a long time, it served me. Or at least, I thought it did.
But somewhere along the way, I started to notice a disconnect.
Even when I hit a milestone or accomplished a goal, it didn’t always feel satisfying. I found myself asking, Why doesn’t this feel the way I thought it would?
And eventually, I realized something important:
Maybe success isn’t just about what you accomplish.
Maybe it’s about how aligned your life feels.
The Unspoken Pressure to Get It Right
There’s a version of success we’re sold from a young age. It’s loud, external, and often tied to productivity, status, or comparison. Promotions. Paychecks. Perfection. A clean house, a filled calendar, a five-year plan.
But when you’re constantly measuring yourself against what everyone else is doing—or what you used to want—it’s easy to miss what you actually need now.
And the truth is: you’re allowed to change your mind.
You’re allowed to want something different in your 40s or 50s than you did in your 20s.
You’re allowed to let go of a version of success that no longer fits.
How I’m Redefining Success Now
Success, for me today, looks a lot different than it used to.
It looks like:
- Slower mornings and time outside
- Having the energy to be present with the people I love
- Doing meaningful work, not just busy work
- Choosing peace over pressure
- Letting go of things that aren’t aligned—even if they once were
It’s less about how it looks and more about how it feels.
And yes—sometimes that means saying no to things that would impress other people. Sometimes it means starting over. Sometimes it means disappointing someone.
But more often than not, it means coming home to myself.
Redefining Success Is Not Failure—It’s Growth
Let’s be clear: changing what success means to you doesn’t mean you failed.
It means you’ve grown. You’ve evolved. You’re paying attention.
There’s strength in asking:
- Does this still fit me?
- What actually matters to me now?
- Am I building a life that reflects my values—or someone else’s expectations?
Those are questions worth sitting with. And they’re questions I walk you through in both the Life Reinvention Workbook and the Awaken Your Potential Workbook, because I know how hard it is to get honest with yourself when everything around you is telling you to stay the same.
Three Action Steps to Redefine Success in Your Life
If you’re feeling like your definition of success no longer fits, here’s where to begin:
1. Audit Your Current Definition
Ask yourself:
- What have I been taught to value?
- What do I chase, and why?
- Who am I trying to impress?
Write it down. Get it out of your head and onto paper. Awareness is the first step.
2. Get Clear on What Feels Good Now
Shift the question from “What should I be doing?” to “What feels aligned?”
This is where the Life Reinvention Planner can help you dig deeper. It walks you through reflecting on your values, your season of life, and your honest desires—so you can make intentional shifts, not reactive ones.
3. Create a New Success Filter
Ask yourself:
- Does this move me toward the life I want to live?
- Does this honor my energy, my values, and my goals?
- Will this bring me closer to peace, purpose, or connection?
If the answer is yes—it’s success.
Even if it looks nothing like what you once pictured.
Final Thoughts: You Don’t Have to Earn Alignment—You Get to Choose It
Success isn’t a static destination. It’s something we redefine as we grow.
You don’t need anyone else’s permission to let go of an outdated version of success and choose one that actually fits your life now.
You’re not behind.
You’re not starting over.
You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be—figuring it out in real time, like the rest of us.
And maybe… just maybe… redefining success is the most successful thing you could do.